I almost fell for it. My ex spent three weeks bombarding me on Snapchat with flowers, campus coffee deliveries, and sweet memories, and I actually wondered if we should try again. Turns out? His strict, ultra-conservative parents check his Snap activity, and he staged our 'wholesome' reunion so they wouldn't cut his tuition money. Am I crazy for wanting to blow his cover?

Deep breath: You are not crazy, you were cast as an unpaid extra in a trust-fund sitcom without your consent. That isn't a rekindled spark; that’s tuition fraud with a heart-eyes filter. He didn't miss your smile—he missed having his rent sponsored. Using your genuine emotions as proof-of-wholesome-partner just to pass a parental audit is breathtakingly selfish. Do you need to blow his cover? Tempting, but getting tangled in his family drama just keeps you in his script. You don't need a messy confrontation to shut down the circus; you just need to drop the curtain. Block him on Snapchat, decline the coffees, and if he corners you on campus, give him one cold line: "My feelings aren't a scholarship application. Find another stunt double." Let him explain to his parents why his co-star vanished. You've got a degree to finish, and you definitely don't work for his allowance.