I'm probably completely overthinking this, but my thumb literally froze at the campus library: my ex who ghosted me into oblivion six months ago just popped up on Tinder. And the weirdest part? His new bio literally quotes our mutual friend group's inside jokes word-for-word. Am I totally insane for wanting to swipe right just to demand an explanation?

Step away from the screen and take your thumb off the trigger. No, you are not insane for wanting closure, but matching with a ghost to ask why he died is a trap. Let’s look at the facts: this guy pulled a Houdini on you half a year ago, yet he’s out here casually crowdsourcing his dating personality from the very friend group he abandoned. That’s not a secret signal meant for you; that’s just pure laziness and emotional cheapness. Swiping right gives him all the power and tells him that vanishing without basic decency still earns him your curiosity. If you really need to vent that adrenaline, screenshot the profile and drop it into your group chat with a deadpan: “Look who resurrected himself using our material.” Let your friends roast him while you swipe left with extreme prejudice. Someone who couldn’t give you a two-sentence breakup text doesn’t deserve a second shot at your algorithm.