I spent an hour setting up a candlelit anniversary call on Discord from the bathroom of my family's vacation house, only to see him streaming Valorant with friends while leaving me on mute in an empty voice channel. How do I even bring this up without sounding pathetic?

Ouch. That’s not you being pathetic; that’s him treating a planned anniversary like an optional side quest. Being stuck in long-distance means screen time *is* your living room. Sitting alone in a voice room with a candle while his status proudly displays he's three rounds deep with the boys isn’t just awkward, it stings like hell. And trying to act cool about it only teaches him that your time comes second to a casual lobby. You don’t need to deliver a dramatic courtroom monologue. Next time you talk, keep it bone-dry and direct: "I dressed up and sat in a holiday bathroom for our anniversary while you played Valorant. That felt completely awful, and we need to talk about our priorities." His reaction will tell you everything you need to know. If he gets defensive or calls you dramatic, the problem isn’t the distance—it’s the effort. Blow out the candle; you deserve someone who actually shows up to the date.