My best friend gets married in four months, and last night at 2 a.m. he snapped me *again* about how they haven't had sex in weeks 💀. I’ve been secretly in love with him forever, and every notification feels like a gut punch. Am I supposed to be the noble best friend who helps him fix his marriage, or do I tell him to stop using me as an emotional surrogate?

Oof. Let’s be blunt: you are currently stuck in the emotional waiting room, and the magazines are terrible. What’s happening here isn’t innocent venting between buddies. He’s taking the emotional intimacy, comfort, and vulnerability he lacks in his relationship and dumping it straight into your DMs—all while keeping the wedding cake on order. It gives him an easy outlet and leaves you bleeding out emotionally. You cannot be the mechanic for an engine you secretly want to own. You don’t owe him free marital counseling, and you definitely don’t have to coach him on how to reignite a spark that breaks your heart. Close the late-night hotline. Next time he starts oversharing, send this: "I care about you, but I can’t be the sounding board for your sex life anymore. That’s a conversation you need to have with your fiancée, not me." It will feel terrifying, but boundaries aren’t cruel—they’re self-defense. Save your energy for someone who chooses you in the daylight, not just when the bedroom goes cold at 2 a.m.