Sorry if this sounds awful, but is it bad that catching my crush in a lie felt like the best day of my life? He ghosted me for three weeks claiming strict medical quarantine, and I was making myself sick with worry. Then my friend found his fresh Tinder profile with gym selfies from yesterday. I didn't cry at all, I just felt totally free. Am I crazy for being relieved?

Pop the sparkling cider: you’re not crazy, you just got handed a golden ticket out of an emotional hostage situation. Worrying about someone who invents a medical crisis to dodge your texts while hitting the squat rack isn't love—it’s bad soap opera acting. That sudden lightness in your chest wasn't apathy, it was your brain finally realizing the guilt trip is over. Relief is the only sane reaction when someone eliminates themselves and leaves timestamped gym evidence at the scene of the crime. Skip the big confrontation. Anyone capable of faking quarantine will just claim the dumbbell rack was a sterile rehab facility anyway. If he ever crawls back into your DMs, hit him with a crisp: "Glad the quarantine gains worked out, best of luck!" and block him into oblivion. Take a deep breath and enjoy your freedom. You just survived his fake tragedy without wasting another second of high school on him.